Monday, July 25, 2011

Memory Lane

I was just looking through this blog with fondness as I really do intend to either wrap it up or revamp it in some way in a few months.  I was reading through those first few blog entries and remembered the day we brought Lydia home.  That week, a lady showed us how the oxygen machine worked, and how the heart monitor was going to work.  I just remember becoming short of breath, panicking and not hearing much of what she was saying, which was freaking me out even more!  I remember being tearful, scared and so worried about not having the safety of the hospital staff around.  What would I do if something happened to the machines and I didn't know what the hell to do?!

I am so past those days, but every now and again I remember something like that and it sneaks up on me a bit.  Preemie parents say this all the time, but I really don't remember how small she was to begin with anymore.  Or at least I don't remember the look or the feel of it.  I remember she felt like nothing, and that her leg was as big and round as my index finger.  Every now and again I look at my finger and remember that.  Honestly, if I didn't have photos to prove it, I wouldn't believe it.

We are one lucky, lucky family.

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